Wow, I totally forgot all about this....
I've been out of touch with everyone for a while now because of some personal things that were going on in my life but I was thinking about that wild side of me tonight and went to read the boards of my fav. review site and realized that I really miss it. I got pretty depressed after my sister passed away early this year and its really taken me quite some time to bounce back, but I am very happy to say my life has been getting ALOT smoother in the past 3 months or so and even though I still get moody every now and then I am feeling back to my old self again. I am thinking of some new creative things I really could enjoy and not actually sure about these ideas yet but ready to talk about it and get more information. I've been considering a little video adventure for funn but not really sure how I would go about it? I have something specific in mind that I want to do and I am hoping that blogging about it might help me reach the right people to help me with it. I have been a naughty girl all year, cuz i really love it and besides that, I heard that the naughty girls get all the presents. I am really getting excited now writing here and realizing something about myself that I guess never occured to me before. You know, all my life I have been a VERY sexual person, very open about my sexuality and comfortable with it. I love ALOT of sex and I always have. I guess you could say I love my inner-slut. :) I loved being a cheerleader, I loved being a dancer & I love providing. IMO, Every person has a "calling", mine just happens to be one of the most enjoyable.
I am also a very social person, I really enjoy meeting new people and talking to people and that was one of the things I really missed the most when I retired from dancing. I feel like I have lived an amazing, wonderful life and that I am doing exactly what I was "meant to do" in this lifetime. Its very fulfilling. I am also a mother, which is by far the biggest priority in my life, but most of my kids are grown now, or very close to it, and I feel lucky to be able to have the chance to do what I enjoy. Like, remember when you had career day in high school? They told us to figure out what we like to do, and enjoy doing,and then search for a career in that field. Well I guess I took it literally, HA! Lucky me that I was also blessed with the looks and the body to actually make a career out of doing what I enjoy the most. Seriously though guys, for a long time I felt bad for being the way that I am but I have come to accept that there is no reason I should feel bad for doing what I love. Society may look down on us for it and that created a conflict within me for a while. I began feeling like I was not "a good person" by society standards and so I took some time away from providing to figure myself out. But just now, thinking about it and looking back on my life, I've realized that I should not allow society to railroad me into behaving like someone I am not. I was denying a HUGE part of myself and trying to pretend it didn't exist but the fact of the matter is, it does exist, its part of "who I am". They say a leopard can't change its spots and why would it even want to try? I just have to figure out how to be discreet enough that society never has a clue who I really am on the inside, its none of thier dam business anyway, really. It's like going into the drugstore and buying 3 different sizes of condoms and when the little 65 yr old lady at the checkout counter gets that confused look on her face, (like they always do), I just look her right in the eye & say, "I've got a really hot looking date tonight & I'm not quite sure what size he'll need, but I am very hopeful!" Then I flash her a huge smile and walk away. Anyway, I've been rambling on here for a while now and I guess I am pretty tired and about to go to sleep for the night. I hope that this helps to shed some light on whats been going on with me for the past 6 months, and I hope I hear from some1 who can point me in the right direction for that little adventure I mentioned earlier, there is a certain some1 I've heard who could easily help me with this but I have no idea how to reach them.
Keep checking back here for more info about me and Have an awesome day everyone, I know I am.