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Young, Dumb, and full of Cum....
I was somewhere between 15 and 17 years old when I met Doug. I had been working the Dry cleaning gig for a couple years now every summer. Doug was approximately 38 or 39 and he was a delivery guy for Coca-cola. And next door to my job in the same strip mall was a liquor store where Doug would deliver soda’s daily.
The only way I could describe Doug was simply adorable!
Doug was SO adorable that it never really crossed my mind to approach him. I always thought that a guy like him had some Jenny McCarthy or Pamela Anderson looking girlfriend, and my black ass didn’t stand a chance. Now don’t get me wrong, I was confident as a mother fucker back in my teenage years, but I wasn’t a pro with the white boys just yet, and approaching a white dude took a little more courage and game.
So day after day I’d watch Doug deliver those sodas, and then quick as a flash he’d be gone. Well after 3 weeks of watching and lusting after Doug, the Sex Gods decided to open an opportunity for me. Doug’s load was a little heavier than usual and he had a hard time getting the door open, so just like the Hustler I am, I ran outside to open the door for him, and that made way for simple conversations between Doug and I.
Everyday I’d see him pull into the parking lot and I’d run out to hold the door open for him. Some days I’d be so desperate to see him that I’d be sitting outside smoking a cigarette and when I saw his truck pull up I’d get weak at the knees.
“What’s up little lady”, he would say to me on the way inside the liquor store.
“Nothing much, just waiting for YOU”, I would say back.
“REALLY, you waiting for me?” he responded.
“Yes, my day doesn’t officially begin till I see you”. I said.
He’d look at me with this half confused, half flattered look and say, “You’re a trip girl”
Everyday during his deliveries, Doug would stop and chat with me for about 10 minutes, and I’d always make the most of that 10 minutes. Soon those 10 minutes turned to 15, then 20, and when Doug started becoming late to his other delivery destinations; he decided to give me his pager number so that we could chat while he was driving making deliveries.
The summer was almost over and school was 2 weeks away, so I knew if I was going to get some dick, I had to act fast. Since I was pretty comfortable with Doug at this point, I just came right out and said the magic phrase that always seems to get me lucky with white dudes which is….” I’ve never been with a white guy before”. Now granted I was young, cute, and promiscuous, and was N-E-V-E-R turned down no matter how young I was, Doug was more than willing to take that risk with me.
So a plan had to be put into place.
Since Doug lived 40 minutes away, and getting a Hotel room with a 15 year old was out of the question, we decided that he would pull his truck to the back of the strip mall, I would pretend to be taking the trash to the dumpster, and we’d have a quick fuck in the back of his truck. Classy Right?
So I climbed inside the back and found a crate to sit on. I pulled off my pants and placed my panties around my ankles, and Doug wanted to enter my pussy unprotected but I didn’t let him.
“You got a rubber”, I asked.
“Do I need one”, he replied. “I’ll take it out when I’m about to cum”
For about 10 seconds I considered letting him do it, that is, until he said something real stupid.
“If you let me cum in you, then jump up and down, all the cum will fall out and you won’t get pregnant”.
I have him the, “God you’re stupid look”, and put my clothes back on.
That experience reminds me so much of the saying, “Young, Dumb, and full of Cum”.
We eventually fucked in a rural area Motel where all the pedophiles went, so the only thing that looked out of place was my black ass. But we did come prepared this time with rubbers and a small travel sized container of Vaseline.
Ahhhh, those were the days.
Website: http://majestichands.com
 
Teen Idol Corey Haim found Dead. RIP
Damn, all my favorite 80’s Idols are fading away. The Lost Boys was a Kick ass fucking Movie.
RIP man!!
Actor Corey Haim -- best known for 80s films including License to Drive and the Lost Boys -- has died at the age of 38.
Los Angeles Police Department confirmed the actor's death to TV station KTLA.
According to police, Haim, who had past substance-abuse problems, died at 3:30 a.m. Wednesday of an accidental overdose.
He reportedly was found unresponsive at his apartment. He was with his mother at the time of his death.
He was later pronounced dead at Providence St. Joseph's Medical Center in Burbank.
Website: http://thehookerchronicles.com
Ho's Gotta eat too....
I’m going to step away from the Hoein’ a moment and talk about my other favorite past time which is - feeding my belly with exotic foods. I’ve even entertained the idea of becoming a food critic or ghost writer for Sauce Magazine, but every media outlet that I wanted to write for were looking for “Volunteer Writers”, and I’m not about to waste my brain power writing articles for free. Fuck that! I’d rater blog about the places that I love to eat at and get paid from the affiliate links.
But the problem that I find with living in predominately “Black areas” is the lack of good places to eat, and if you live in “da hood”, then you’re really screwed. The only thing the Hood has to offer is Fried Chicken Joints, Bad Chinese food, White Castles, and Subway sandwich shops ran by Arabs and Indians. And if you’re lucky you may get a soul food restaurant or Tamale shack that remained in the area since the 60’s. But the problem with a lot of those restaurants is many change hands over the years and looses a lot of the fabulousness that made it popular. Look at London and Sons.
Anyone who’s a St. Louis native should know about London and Sons, Sweetie Pies, Brown Sugar, and White barn. Some of those places still have good food, and some don’t. That’s why it’s imperative that I live in a diverse neighborhood where the people are serious about serving good food and having a good reputation.
Take White Barn for instance. White Barn is a hamburger shack that’s smack dab in the middle of the ghetto, but everyone from Doctors, Lawyers, and business men would go there because the food was fabulous. Then the owners sold it to some degenerates, and the food turn to shit. I remember one day I stopped by there to get my son a plain Hot Dog, and I could see some teenagers cooking my food and listening to Rap music, and right then I knew my food was going to be shit. So when they handed me my greasy see through paper bag, I was horrified when I got home to see that those degenerates had put my son’s hot dog on a Hamburger bun. What the Fuck??
But thankfully today the areas that I frequent have fabulous diverse restaurants. And although one of my favorites is a Sushi joint that’s frequented by a bunch of arrogant pompous pricks, I have to remember that I’m there for the good food and not the people.
Can I ask you good people for a favor?
Can you give me a restaurant recommendation? It can be anywhere in the world?
Give me the Name, City- State-or Country, and Type of food they serve. Leave a comment!
Website: http://professionalfatgurl.blogspot.com/
Sucking Dicks in the Parking lot...
The year was 1992, and it was the summer before I was set to begin 9th grade. Summer was restless, so my parents felt it was in my best interest to get a part-time job to keep me occupied. So just like many other teenagers, I went and filled out applications at many neighborhood establishments.
And with the gift of manipulation, I was able to land a “lazy person’s job” at a local dry cleaner waiting on customers and tagging clothes. As I was sitting at the counter completing my application, another woman walked in and asked for an application. So here we were sitting side by side completing applications. We struck up a friendly conversation and she told me her name was Cindy and she was a recovering drug addict that needed a job in order to get her kids back from state custody. Since I never pass judgment on another person’s past, I wished her good luck, and hopefully we’ll be working together soon. We shook hands and left.
The next day I got the call from the cleaners that I got the job and they wanted me to start ASAP. When I arrived I saw that Cindy was there too and I was delighted to see her. She actually hugged me when I walked in. She was really cool people.
Cindy and I worked side by side for 2 weeks; we mopped the floors, cleaned the bathroom, waited on customers, and tagged clothes. We even managed to go to lunch a few times together. It was delightful.
She confided in me that she was a crack addict and did all kinds of fucked up shit to get high, and lost her kids when she went to jail for drug possession and prostitution. And part of her agreement to get her kids back was getting a job and a place to stay. I talked to her about my promiscuity and she would always tell me to be careful.
That day was pay day and the boss was passing out checks when we got back from lunch. This was our first check and both of us were excited as hell to finally be getting paid. Both of our checks were $95.00. I could see the disgust in Cindy’s face as she grabbed the calculator and tallied up her hours to make sure that her check was correct. She stood there for 10 minutes staring miserably at her check and tapping her fingers against the counter.
“$95.00 FOR TWO FUCKING WEEKS” She yelled at the top of her lungs. I frantically tried to calm her down because I didn’t want her to loose her job. I pulled her to the back and explained that they probably held back the first week and her next check will be greater. Well, she wasn’t hearing that. She told me that she was living in a motel and owed them some money, and she also needed to pay for 2 extra days so that her kids can come and visit on the weekend. I offered to give her my $95.00 check but she refused and said;
“No thank You Erika… I can make more money sucking dicks out in the parking lot”.
Website: http://majestichands.com
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